Skip to main content

Whole30 Day 25

I keep having very vivid dreams that I break the "rules" and eat a bunch of breads or something else off plan. It's disheartening. This morning the feeling from the dream is still there and I'm actually sad. This week has been hard for me not to go back to my old ways and emotionally eat. I guess I did a little but it's been with healthy foods at least.
Last night my littlest had her first Christmas program. It was absolutely adorable. Afterwards, my little family got cupcakes. I obviously opted out. 

So apparently I've stopped taking food pictures. Ok. Everything seems to be a repeat right now anyway. 
Meal1: chicken with bell peppers and onion in a turkey broth. 
Then some guacamole with green bell pepper and cucumber. 
Meal 2: chicken chili soup 
Strawberries and almond butter
Clean jerky with no soy sauce. 
Half a Laura bar
Meal3: tacos of grassfed ground meat and chicken, bell peppers, onion and guac. And broccoli. 

Feeling frustrated with my acne. Which has improved but due to scaring and a recent flare up, doesn't really look like it. 

And wanting to eat all the comfort foods around. Secretly I allowed myself to finish up my whole30 tonight. Tomorrow is my husbands birthday and our Christmas party and it just made sense to just end it five days early. But I couldn't bring myself to eat any of it. So here I am still :)


Popular posts from this blog

Just another story.

I have been told telling my story will help.. people. I don't see how that is the case but I figure there is some reason I have dealt with the things that I have. So I'll start out simple.


Crippling. Suffocating. Like a straight jacket warn under water.

Sounds so dramatic. So exaggerated. But it's so real. There's a quote that describes it perfectly "You don't need water to feel like you're drowning, do you?" no. I don't.

I've always had anxiety. for as long as I remember. After I had my youngest child it got significantly worse. It was no longer a panic attack that I would get over once I figured out or was proven everything would be okay. It was tightness in my chest all night and I didn't know why. It was someone is going to get sick and I know that will kill us all. It was sleeping in his room every night for months. It was waking up every few hours to check his breathing. It was my daughter has a sore tooth it's all goi…

society is an asshole.

Guys. I've never been much of a blogger on facts. I've never been a blogger that's great at  being consistent.. In fact I seem to get passionate or be "set off" by generally the same things throughout the years, so I tend to avoid blogging, to be honest. But guys... girls.... general population: THIS needs to be said.

I am not sorry for being who I am. You should not be either.

Reads simply, right? It is a very common and popular perspective in the internet world these days. It should be. But as much as we write it. say it. hear it. read it.... it's still seems to be a struggle. WHY? .... society, guys. Society is an asshole. Media WANTS us to not be okay with our bodies. The retail world wants us to go into debt being unsatisfied with what we already have. This society has been set up to make us unsatisfied unless we consume, consume, consume, need, need, need, and hate ourselves, our personalities, our bodies. because that means we are constantly trying to …

Fear is a liar.

ˈfir/ noun 1.  an unpleasant emotion caused by the belief that someone or something is dangerous, likely to cause pain, or a threat. "drivers are threatening to quit their jobs in fear after a cabby's murder" synonyms:terrorfright, fearfulness, horroralarmpanicagitationtrepidationdreadconsternationdismaydistress Fear is necessary. It keeps us safe. It helps us think logically about decisions we need to make. But it can also go too far sometimes, or in my case, fear is generally the enemy.

Okay, so you know how fear kind of like nudges you every once in a while and whispers that something is WRONG? and that you need that fear to stay away from unhealthy, downright dangerous things? I had that. About almost everything. My whisper became so loud, I could not hear anything else. It roared instead of tiptoed, it was terror in the face of light, fear in the place of a smile. Nothing was okay and no one could fix it.  For months straight I prayed, I cried, I …